i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
Someone stole a lamp last night.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
