Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
