That's intense
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
Semen is not good for contacts.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
he had hair everywhere except his balls
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