Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
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