butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
Randomize
