kristin has been a bad kristin
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize