let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
