Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
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