yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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