i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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