dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
