they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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