My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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