just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
