He is an equal opportunity slut.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
