Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
I came so hard my ears popped.
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