Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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