my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
