so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
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