Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Randomize
