The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
