awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Randomize
