No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
The adults are the big ones right?
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
