check it out our google latitudes are spooning
i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
