If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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