is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize
