I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
