He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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