Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
