Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
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