I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize
