I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
be right there i have to get my cape
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Randomize
