It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
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