It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
i just had sex bonerless
Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
