2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Randomize