Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Randomize
