I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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