I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
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