That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
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