thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Randomize
