What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
Randomize
