he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
