quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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