oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize