I swear she didn't look like that last week.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Randomize
