she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Randomize
