I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
Randomize
