We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
