I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
I could have mohawked her pubes.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
I want a musical about memes.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Randomize
