Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
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